Saturday, January 29, 2011

The Flood

A cyclone is meant to be hitting Perth tomorrow and this reminded me of all the crazy whether in Queensland. All the flooding has been devastating and my thoughts go out to all those people.

I'm also writing about my own experience though. Out of the most awful circumstances I've found that with the right perspective everything works out even better than hoped and your bad experiences make you stronger. There is always something to be thankful for and something positive to be focused on. You just need to look to what REALLY matters. Your family and friends, your health, your happiness.

Many have lost family members though and we should all take a moment to think of these poor people who've lost more than everything. May they find happiness after all this tragedy.

I would also like to add that this poem is still largely autobiographical and should not be taken as how I think any of the flood victims should feel or learn from what's happened. This is just a poem of one "imaginary" person's experience that I hope people get something from.


The Flood

I remember the flood
In just one treacherous day
All I owned was washed away

Face down in the mud
As down on my knees I fell
The city I'd called home was now my hell

I still recall the shock
As if none of it was real
I was completely numb except for this feeling

Like my belly was full of rocks
Then my son and daughter hugged me, oh so sad
And I felt an immense thanks for all that I still had

Everything had changed I knew
I may have lost all my possessions plus my cat
But so many had lost so much more than that

I was one of the lucky few
And despite all that I've lost
For me what I have learned was worth the cost

For now all is clear
I have my perspective and my priorities right
I know what it truly means to fight

All I need is here
My family, my integrity, my health
Happiness lies not in my possessions or my wealth

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Some new ideas...

Most of the time I've spent on my guitar recently I've been practicing for my gig on Monday at Mojo's but tonight I took some time out to record some new ideas on my acoustic. I'll get my new song for the week written in the next day or so.

Let me know if you think any of these new ideas should be top of the list to be finished into complete songs. You can e-mail me at myfighttowrite@gmail.com or leave a comment below.






Tuesday, January 25, 2011

My first solo gig...

Those of you reading this from Perth take special note - next Monday night is my first gig as a solo artist. I'm playing at Mojo's Bar in North Fremantle, 31st January at 9pm. I've been very lucky that an old friend of mine, Arunachala Satgunasingam, happens to be in WA from Melbourne doing a tour and is available to play percussion for the gig. It's going to be a lot of fun! I'm very excited about it.


To add to the excitement it's free entry, so I hope some of you Perthies can make it! For more info or to invite friends via Facebook click herehttp://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=176816029022692


The main reason I mention this is because my creative time today has been spent practicing and re-recording the songs, as some little things have changed and I'd like Arun to have correct recordings. They're still far from perfect but an improvement I think. I'm looking forward to getting to LA and doing good quality recordings, with more instrumentation and vocal harmonies, not to mention better guitar playing and singing! 


So these are the songs I'll be playing Monday. To not completely ruin the suspense I'll put them in random order rather the order I'll play them on the night. Just click on the name to be taken to the post that has the recording embedded. 


Hey (I Am Here For You Every Day)


Take A Holiday


My First Night On The Town


Lips and Straws

I will just say also that I have been doing my daily writing. I've been writing poetry, but some things I just want to keep between me and the recipient - namely Sam. ;) I've probably shared enough gushing romance with my readers for now. Although, if you really want more feel free to ask me at myfighttowrite@gmail.com or by commenting below.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Friends

One of the great things about coming back to Perth is seeing old friends. Particularly the really long-standing close friends that never seem all that far away, even when you're galavanting around the world like I have been of late. That's not to say that you keep in touch really frequently, but more that you know that they're only ever a call, text, e-mail, Skype message, Facebook chat away, whenever either of you have the time, or just need a good friend to talk to.

I'm lucky to have some really great friends. They give me so much support and add so many good times and laughter to my life. Thank-you so much to all my friends reading! But also to any that may not be. It's time I paid tribute to you.

Here goes;


Friends


Good times shared over many years
Sometimes laughs and sometimes tears
But the greatest truth which I can say
Is when you need them they're not far away

They never note who contacted last
And no matter how much time has past
It always seems like yesterday
You chatted endless hours away

They know the things that few could know
The secrets shared when times were low
That you were scared to share but knew
Deep down, they would not think less of you

You've watched each other's lives progress
Always there to bring some happiness
And help you find the answers to
The questions now confounding you

They know the many facets you possess
All the good, the bad, the strange and the rest
And accept you exactly as you are
For they know that the real you is best by far

And this is what it all comes down to
That when you're with a friend you're completely you
So just relax and enjoy a drink at the bar
And hope the next time won't be far

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Turning Off The Negative...part 2

Yesterday I started writing about turning off negative self talk and negativity generally. If you haven't read yesterday's post it would be best that you do before reading this, but each section could be read on its own I believe.

So as I was saying yesterday, becoming aware of your negative self talk can gradually breed a more positive feeling of happiness with yourself, which is crucial in implementing positives change in your life.

I was going on to say that I do not mean you should never feel down or upset about something you've done or that's happened. You have a right to feel unhappy or down about things from time to time. That's life. It's not a problem. It is in fact a healthy response. The problem is how you react to these feelings.

The problem with these negative feelings is that our instinctive reaction to them tends to create more negativity. A good example is that you have something annoying happen and you think "I hate it when that happens." A little while later another annoying thing happens and you think "I hate it when that happens, too. Why are so many annoying things happening to me?" You inevitably (although often unconsciously) find yourself an answer to this question, and that answer almost always involves more negativity. Particularly as you will now be looking for the next negative thing that will prove your reasoning.

You could direct the initial negative feeling into something more positive and break that cycle of instinctive negativity. For example (and my friends will understand why I use this example), if you are annoyed with yourself that you are running late then it is fair enough that you should be annoyed as it's not good to be late. This negative feeling of annoyance could be followed up with a bunch of negative self talk such as "you're such a space cadet! Why don't you pay more attention to what the time is? Why did you try to fit so much in? Everyone is going to be put out and hassle you about being late again and you'll feel embarrassed and more annoyed..." and of course as a result of all this thought the situation gets more and more negative.

The simple fact is your late and there is very little you can do about it. So don't spend the rest of your trip talking negatively to yourself. Put the energy into considering how you will better handle the situation next time so this negative situation doesn't occur again. Maybe you will need to make a more detailed plan of your day to be sure you're not planning too much? Maybe you need to allow yourself more time to get ready? Maybe you need to set your alarm right at the time you want to rise and not use the snooze button at all? Whatever the possible solution put your energy into positive thoughts about solutions, then put energy into taking action on those solutions.

There are not always solutions though. Sometimes a situation that is largely beyond your control is causing you to be down, or something that is changing but is taking a long time to change and causing subsequent frustration and sadness. So you can't change it. Or you're already doing all you can but it's simply going to take more time. In this case you should direct the negative energy towards something positive. You're feeling flat so rather than just sit down moping, focused on the subject of your concern and unhappiness, go and pick up your guitar, or your paint brushes, or whatever you have in your life that puts a smile on your face, and direct energy into that . There has to be something that puts a smile on your face. Preferably something that involves action. So if you're not into artistic things then go for a run, do some house cleaning, bake a cake, polish your car. Anything that will result in a smile at the end of it.

You will find that at the end of this that even if the problem you've got is still there you'll feel a bit happier just knowing you were productive with your energy and that you got your focus away from what was getting you down.

Turning off negativity, or directing negative feelings and energy into positive things, can be a big catalyst to change in your life and more happiness is always going to come with that. So be aware of the way you think. With awareness will come change.

People became aware that there was a growing problem with our global environment and we needed to be more conscious of our carbon emissions and general pollution. Soon enough someone designed a Prius. That may not be the perfect example but basically, once we become aware that there is something that needs changing we've made the first step to seeing that change happen.

The last step is commitment. But that will have to wait until another day. In fact I think I already wrote about that last week. How much do you want the change to happen? When people are frustrated that change is not occurring as fast as they'd like I usual say they should feel glad they're aware there is a problem that needs addressing. You may not like that you exercise a pile and lose little or no weight, but you should take the perspective of being glad that you're simply aware that you want to lose weight. If you stopped caring or were oblivious you would soon be seriously obese, probably with diabetes, extremely unhappy and most likely on your death bed years before your time.

Due to your awareness you're doing some exercise, watching what you eat, trying to be healthy generally, even if you can only manage just a little weight loss. This is so much better than being ignorant to the problem.

Be thankful for the little steps. They are a move forward, And any move forward is a good move to be making. Don't be hard on yourself for not achieving more. Just move your goals up a little when you believe you can without being unrealistic. Each little achievement will motivate you on, and before you know it big changes - positive changes - will be happening in your life.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

Friday, January 21, 2011

Turning Off The Negative...part 1

I've suddenly felt inspired to write about something that I've found myself thinking and talking about to a number of people recently.

The first part to discuss is negative self talk. I guess you could call this the technical term for seemly innocuous little comments you make to yourself like, "I'm such an idiot", "I'm just being dumb", "Gees, I'm so stupid sometimes", or "I can't do that. I'm just no good at it." You get the picture.

Despite this sort of self talk coming into my awareness about 12 years ago it's still something I have to work on every day. But that said it's now much better. Interestingly, when I get down I tend to let myself get away with saying these things, which then drives me down further. Breaking out of the habit of saying these impulsive comments to yourself can really help turn your thought process more positive. And although it can take a while it's not a complicated process.

When I've taught instruments to students, let's say guitar for illustration purposes, and they ask "how do you get your left hand to move so little and so quickly and exactly?" I explain that step one is becoming aware of what you want to change. Simply being aware that you don't want your little finger to move so far back when it's changing positions will result in the finger moving less, simply because you're aware that it's moving further than you want it to.

Once you're aware then you simply have to say to yourself  "don't do that any more - do this" every time you notice the thing you want to change. The last step is going slowly and being patient with yourself. The change won't happen overnight, but if you are persistent yet patient at the same time you will suddenly notice one day that the change has occurred and you don't think about it anymore, or at least very little.

This is what has to be done to manage negative self talk. Firstly, notice when you do it. Secondly, tell yourself that this is a destructive thought and that what you're saying to yourself is not true, it is just negative. Thirdly, don't let yourself get away with it - EVER. Be persistent but be patient. It will take a while and you will still do it from time to time but all you need to know is that you're noticing it, telling yourself not to do it, then continuing on without getting frustrated with yourself over it.

Soon enough these negative thoughts will turn up very infrequently, if at all. At which time you will very likely notice that your life has made some positive changes for the better also. At very least in regard to your self-esteem and feelings of confidence and happiness with yourself.

Feeling happy with yourself is a big part of the happiness of life. If you break down what makes you unhappy in life you will probably be surprised how often it comes back to something like "I made a bad decision", whether it was very recently or years ago, or "I wanted to achieve more than this by my age", or "I can never get that thing to change! Why? I'm so useless!" If you focus on removing the negative self talk then you will find a new-found positive attitude towards yourself which will quite likely see life improve in many areas.

But there is more to this I think. I'm not saying that you should never feel down about anything, even if this means feeling annoyance, anger or sadness (etc...) with yourself or something that's happened in your life. You have a right to feel down sometimes, and you probably have very good reason. The problem is not that you feel down. The problem is how you react to these feelings. These are negative feelings by nature. But the energy they create can, with an adjusted perspective, breed positivity rather than more negativity.

I'm going to leave it there though and write more on that tomorrow as I don't want this to go any longer than it already has. Thanks for reading and I hope you come back tomorrow to read part 2.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Hey (I Am Here For You Every Day)

I'm happy to say this week's song is being posted earlier than Saturday or Sunday night. I felt inspired today and decided to blow off work and do writing. My "Boss" (Dad) is probably reading this, but I know he'll understand.

It's just a simple tune about being there for the people you love and the people you love being there for you. Everyone gets down sometimes and when you do it's better to just feel it, let out what you're feeling to a friend or family member, then feel happiness in the fact that the person you are speaking to is there for you - every day.

I think I'll have to add this to my set at Mojo's Bar in North Fremantle on Monday 31st Jan, 9pm.


Hey (I’m Here For You Every Day)



No-one can be strong every day
You may want to lay down and make the world go away
But when these moments come to make you blue
You have to look around and know I am always here for you

Singing hey
I am here for you every day

Everyone has some troubled times
Life has a way of upsetting your rhymes
But it’s OK, this is just the way it is
Just let it all out, but never forget this

I’m singing hey
I am here for you every day

I want you to know
That you will never walk alone
I want you to know
That when the hard times come
And you’re feeling down
You can always count on some

To be singing hey
We are here for you every day

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

My Dear Father

I haven't posted for a few days as I've done writing but have been back to my internet usage issues, which has made it difficult when coupled with how busy I've been.

Hopefully today's poem is worth the wait. It's written for my Dad. I don't think a lot needs to be said that the poem doesn't say. But I would just like to say to my Dad, I've really enjoyed our time together over the past couple of months. For so many different reasons you have made this time SO much more enjoyable and productive than it wouldn't have been if not for you. Thank-you! I love you.

If my Mum is reading, I will write something specifically for you, that addresses what I love about you and why you are such a great Mum, sometime before long, when I feel it's the most poignant opportunity.

I hope many people can apply this to their own relationship with their father. I know that there are many who wouldn't be able to though and it is for this reason that I know I am extremely lucky.

Press play on the media player to hear me reciting the poem. I like to do this with personal poems as it has more meaning I feel.


My Dear Father



Every day I’ve been me there’s been you
Ever since my first breath there’s been nothing you wouldn’t do
For me – any time, any day, any way you could see
That might help me be smiling and happy

Nothing more true could ever be said
Nothing but love and unselfishness flow through your head
And your heart when you think of me every day
You show your love for me in so many ways

I know it would be quite futile to list
All the things that you’ve done for many would be missed
But I will say this one thing to which you can stake claim
That without you my life would not be the same

For because of you I have had choices
I have not had my hands tied by life’s powerful forces
I have always had freedom to pursue my life’s dreams
And had support when life ripped at the seams

And you’ve allowed my dreams and choices to be
What I wanted and not what you could see was best for me
And still you continue to do this so I can grow
From the mistakes that I make along my road

I must say that I’m proud to call you a friend
And I want you to know I will be there for you ‘til the end
All the while knowing there is most certainly no way
Your gifts and sacrifices could ever be repaid

But may what I write here in rhyme
Be something to remind you each and every time
You do something for me that I appreciate it so
For it means so much to me that you know

I love you so much and as with you
Have done so since right back from when I was in the womb
And I know this because I do not remember a day
I haven’t loved you, my dear father, in every way

Saturday, January 15, 2011

My Beauty's Lullaby

In continuation of my theme from last post I've written a lullaby song today.

It needs to be sung by a real vocal talent the standard of Jeff Buckley, but I hope I'll get better at it. Certainly these sorts of recordings are hardly going to make me sound my best. But as I keep saying, this blog isn't about that. I hope I pull it off well enough to get across the mood and emotion of the song.

I'd also like to mention here that I want vocal harmonies to be a big part of the sound these new folk songs of mine ultimately have. Like Simon and Garfunkel or The Beach Boys, or Fleet Foxes for something more current. Although I do like the simplicity of a guitar and vocal it would be nice to hear this with a few vocal harmony parts. Ultimately these songs will have a whole lot more added but for now I'm enjoying just bare-bones songs. I'll get onto some tracked recording when I have my good microphone and recording set up happening again.

So here it is. My song for this week.

My Beauty’s Lullaby



My beauty sleep
You’re not alone tonight
For I am here
By your side

Breathe so deep
Slowly close your eyes
No need to fear
I am by your side

On sweet breeze float  [I sang "fly" on the recording, but wasn't going to redo it as it.]
Down and rest by bubbling stream
Then fly by my side
Over fields of green

When you hear
Scary sounds outside
Your knight appears
With his sword so bright

So feel me here
Let go of all your fright
I am always near
Put your hand in mine

And sleep my beauty
Sleep in peace tonight  [I also didn't say "in peace" on the recording. Oops.]

Friday, January 14, 2011

Lullaby

Firstly, I've done a new version of my newest song "Take A Holiday". I'm playing a singing it a little bit differently and it it's a little faster. I'm not certain I'm happy with the tempo on this recording. It should probably be slower. But let me know what you think. Click here to go to that blog entry and listen.

Sometimes my creative time will happen for a spontaneous reason. I prefer this and find that I wait for the moment I feel inspired rather than sitting down and forcing myself to write something at a certain time each day, as I had been planning to.

So I'm going to share something that I wrote for Sam when she text me the other night, unable to get to sleep. I know that she likes reading my poetry and that it calms her mind. So I thought this would help.

Lullaby

With these few words I send you here
Comes love and longing to have you near
But along with this a magic spell
To make you fall down sleeps deep well
But not a well that's full of fear
But one where your cares disappear
And you don't fall fast but float down slow
Into sleep's peaceful clouds below

Thursday, January 13, 2011

They Breed

One of the things I really love about creativity is that in is an amazing outlet to turn negative things into positive things. You feel anger, hurt, sadness - you create something that others can relate to and connect with, which at the same time helps you express your feelings and redirect that negative energy into a positive action.

I've had some negative things running through my head in the past two days. Once I wrote the following poem though I felt good about having used the negative energy in a positive way, as I get some much satisfaction from expressing my feelings in a poem like this.

It isn't a happy poem. But it still makes me happy. That's the amazing thing with sharing your creativity.

There are many meanings to read into this poem. Take from it what you will. That is what I intend when I write. It's now yours to decipher meanings and connect with a message.

I will say though that little seemingly innocuous negative thoughts and feelings which go unnoticed, or which are ignored and not taken seriously, soon breed into a massive, rampant, out of control beasts which can't be controlled or tamed. What easily slips past our attention becomes much larger problems and negativity. We should try to resolve issues as they sprout, rather than dealing with it all once the war has begun and the problem has grown into a huge beast.


They Breed

They breed
The disrespecters' seeds
Little organisms sprout like weeds

They grow
So fast you do not know
Not on the skin but just below

They spread
Like lice on children's heads
Like mice fattened on crumbs under your bed

Infestation
Aggressively expressed indignation
Break down of all communication
Battle cries from once allied nations
Signed up soldiers line up at stations

It's war
We must settle the score
This time will end it all I'm sure

It must
Trample the rest to dust
Each avid team screams "In God we trust"

But it seems
That all these freedom dreams
Are about control and not equal means

So today
As the war gets underway
Disrespecters' seeds clinging to street-smart strays
Contempt and hate grow every day
I turn my back to the incited fray

It's clear why peace is always so far away

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

How much do you want it...part 2

Yesterday I started a post about committing to changes in your life. If you haven't read it then read it first before continuing here.

Now where was I...

Secondly, I didn't have my priorities straight. I'd been slowly getting there. I haven't owned a TV for 3 years. I long ago gave up playing any computer games. I minimised anything that didn't directly relate to my music career. But I still wasn't getting writing done as something would always be there to distract me - most often e-mailing or worrying about money. I had to accept that the satisfaction I got form being prompt with e-mail replying did not outweigh the unhappiness that resulted from not getting writing done. I realise money can't be ignored and must be some what of a priority but you must know where to draw the line as money in itself doesn't make you happy. Having had lots of money and no money this is my experience.

Keeping my priorities straight is still something I have to mentally commit to every day. I'm easily distracted and I have to keep my eye on the ball, knowing that the only way I will be the happiest person I can be is by getting writing done. So that simply MUST be my priority.

This leads to "thirdly". I was trying pretty hard and expending a lot of energy and frustration but, bottom line, I just wasn't committed enough. I wasn't seeing the consequences of me not being committed. I had to see that if I didn't commit fully I would never be an artist. But more importantly, I would never be truly happy within myself. I had to completely commit to my own happiness. This sounds pretty easy, but funnily enough it isn't. It takes a lot of determination, but also some selfishness, which doesn't come naturally for me.

Most importantly though "committing" is about not letting yourself make excuses. You have to make yourself accountable and be aware of the excuses you make. Can you really not find time? Or are you just not getting your priorities right? Are you absolutely committed to being happy and achieving what you want for your life?

I've been wanting to do more cardio exercise like jogging and also do yoga every morning. I kept saying there was no time. Until I finally decided I simply had to make it happen for my own health and happiness. I made the time by adjusting my priorities and time management. I absolutely committed to doing it. And now I do it every day. I stopped letting myself make excuses and just made it happen. 

You've got to break the cycle of excuses and quite simply commit fully. MAKE. IT. HAPPEN. Do not let it be any other way.

As you can see I've decided that I'm going to punctuate things with words in capitals separated by full stops today. Is that working for you?

Lastly, not being fully committed had a lot to do with motivation. A lot of de-motivation came from feeling daunted due to looking at the size of the whole problem. There is a saying “Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.” This may seem to contradict what I'm saying but the point is that if you worry about today's pebbles - the little things you can do, the little steps, the little problems - instead of just staring at the impossibly big mountain you will one day find you have climbed that mountain.

Anyway, I've gone on quite long enough as always. If you want to make a change in your life then commit to it fully. No more excuses. No more negativity. No more backwards priorities.

It can be hard to accept but you DO have control of your life. Take the reigns. Make the change.

Monday, January 10, 2011

How much do you want it...

I was thinking yesterday about how before doing the writing for The Stuns debut album in I'd written 2 completed songs in 3 years. And since the completion of that album in Jan '10 I didn't write anything new until I wrote some new songs with my brother Luke's band in September '10 and didn't complete anything else for the Stuns, or purely for myself, until Nov '10. I was also writing very little poetry, and wasn't showing anyone my poetry at that stage. I wanted to be completing songs in this time but "couldn't find time" for whatever reason. I actually find it embarrassing to tell you this.

As I said when I started this blog I realised that if I wanted to be an artist I quite simply had to write and actually finish things, which meant I needed to completely commit to making time, and adjusting my priorities and time management so this would happen.

In the past 3 months I've written 9 songs (2 co-written with The Stuns) and 7 of those were written in less than the last month. I've also written piles of poetry in that time. Just peruse my blog. Here are the songs in the order they were written. If you haven't heard any of them just click on the name and you'll be taken to that entry.

Mistaken Stranger (The Stuns)
Gretchen, Don't Change Direction (The Stuns - no recording available)
Sunset To Sunrise
Morning Memories
My First Night On The Town
Lips and Straws
Penny and Jacob
The Only Way (no complete recording)
Take A Holiday

If you have a favourite out of these please comment below or e-mail me at myfighttowrite@gmail.com and let me know. I'd be very interested to get your feedback.

Needless to say I'm rather impressed with my increased creative productivity. But it's taken such a long time to get it to happen. It's now clear to me what the problem was.

Firstly, I was thinking negatively about myself and my writing and life in general, and not really trying hard to change that. You CAN NOT get positivity and motivation from negative thinking. I used to be disappointed in what I'd achieved every day and had it in my mind that this disappointment would motivate me to be more productive tomorrow. IT. DID. NOT. WORK. I can't press this point enough. Find motivation through setting realistic goals for your day and feeling happy that you achieved them. Gradually set your goals higher if you think you can but always - absolutely always - find the positives in what you've achieved, no matter how small. Not the negatives. From positive thoughts you will find the motivation to gradually make the changes you want to see for yourself.

Adjust your perspective. See the positive. Think the positive. Do not humour ANY negativity at all. You will soon be a more happy, positive person. I will add to this that being constructively critical of yourself and being negative are not the same thing. The ability to self-critical is required for self-improvement and change. But that's a subject for another day.

I don't want to give you to much to read and think about at once so I'm going to continue this in my next post.

Between now and then think about how much you want to get motivated and make changes in your life. If you really do I say tune into tomorrow's post.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Take A Holiday

Well, here it is. My song for last week.

I must say that I'm glad I made my resolution as it took me a while to find what I wanted to say and how I wanted it to sound for this one and I may have given up sooner was I not so determined to meet my deadline. It all suddenly came together and flowed with ease from there, which was very satisfying.

The recording is, as always, terrible quality. The playing, the sound, the singing, the lot. But I think you'll get a feeling for the vibe of the song and it's basic feel, melody and meaning.

It's another light-hearted, fun tune. I hope you like it.


Take A Holiday




Won’t you
Take a holiday
With me
You know we should get away
‘Cause lately
I’ve been missing you
There’s many
Things I would like to do
With you

We need some island sun
Clear waters blue
Surfing would be fun
I really think so, don’t you
We could dance all night
Then stay in bed til 2
What could be more right
Than spending every moment

With you
Come take a holiday
Swimming
And drinking big cocktails
Coz lately
I’ve been missing you
There isn’t
Anymore time to lose
So please

We need some island sun
Coconut juice
Baby won’t you come
I really want you to
I can hold you tight
Or walk an hour or two
And while we do I’d like
To be holding hands

With you
We’ll take a holiday
Hawaii
There’s no better place
To be
Than always next to you
Some things
You simply have to do

Like loving your lover
Kissing them all over
Making them know that you
Don’t want any other
Because if you know that
You love one another
There’s nothing more pressing
Than asking that question

Lover, won’t you
Take a holiday
With me
You know we should get away
‘Cause lately
I’ve been missing you
There’s many
Things I would like to do
With you
Take a holiday
With me
You know we should get away

Saturday, January 8, 2011

New Acoustic Music

So time to get focused on songs as the deadline for my song a week goal is looming. I have already written a song this week but I can't sing and play it all well enough to record so I feel I need to have another written.

Here is an acoustic idea that I haven't yet finished putting a melody and lyrics to. Something fun (although you have to get past the first 20 seconds to get to the fun - you'll understand that once you hear the lyrics/melody) and jumpy and hopefully a with a bit of a groove. Although I don't feel this recording captures that. I've not played this much yet so I rushed this recording quite a bit I think.

Well, here it is. Leave a comment and let me know what you think.

Friday, January 7, 2011

I Have A Love

Firstly - I've added an extra verse, the penultimate verse, to my poem from yesterday. When I first wrote this poem I was actually writing it into my phone as a text to send Sam and my prehistoric phone screwed up right as I'd finished it and I lost it all. After spending a number of hours trying to emotionally recover from my devastation I managed to remember most it, plus add some new verses, but I remembered that extra verse after I'd posted the poem yesterday. So I just had to add it in. Read it and I think you'll see why. I also re-recorded me reading the poem and updated the player.

So let me explain something. I've not been too overt on this blog about my relationship with Sam as I didn't want to turn this into a blog people load up when they want to feel the need to throw up. As I said yesterday I have actually been quite jaded with romance and to read something like this may well have had myself (and also Sam previously) reaching for a bucket due to such overly enthusiastic proclamations of Hollywood-esque love. But now I'm simply expressing my honest feelings. And although I still didn't want to turn this into a blog of endless romanticism I really wanted to post that poem and tell everyone how I feel, as I'm very proud of my girl and my love for her.

But there is still more. There is actually a lot more but I simply don't post it all to my blog. But this poem I'm going to post. As it follows on from the last one. The last one was to everyone else. This one is to Sam. I'll see if I can't get back to another subject after this. Although you may realise by now that quite a bit of what I've been writing has been on this subject, but you just didn't know it. (Well, Sam knew. But not most others.)

So here it is. One of my poems, specifically to Sam. The one that followed on from yesterday's post.


I Have A Love





I have a love in my heart that burns like the sun
I let it shine out brightly to be seen by everyone
So they can all know something amazing has begun

For this rare love that I share is experienced by few
I know without doubt this is very much true
And the only reason I get to feel this is you

And this is why for you, my love, I'm so thankful
No gift in this world could ever be nearly as meaningful
And no other woman could ever be nearly as beautiful

You have changed my life, I know this for sure
Like a sailor lost at sea finally finding the shore
That for so many lost days and nights he searched for

I'm now here, I am safe, I kiss the ground in pure joy
For I've found the love I've searched for since I was a boy
And now all that we need to do is enjoy

This moment, and the next, and onto the next one
For all of our days with continuous appreciation
And laughter, and love, and happiness, and fun

And support, and discussion, and sharing all things
No matter how much good or bad this life brings
No matter the worth of our house, cars or rings

And may all the world hear the love song my heart sings

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

I Have A Girl

So for those who've known me for a while, or are also fans of The Stuns music, my recent romantic bent will have seemed like quite a change. And it certainly has been. Ed and Austin from The Stuns used to often rib me about my inability to write any lyrics that weren't dark and often skeptical and jaded. There was a lot of positivity mixed into it but it was quite masked within all the deep dark feelings. This is something I've been coming out of over this year and have found in myself a new positivity and vibrance that I had largely lost for quite a few years.

I think positive things happen to positive people. And that's exactly what happened to me. I had a seriously negative situation which led me to be in Los Angeles about 6 months earlier than originally planned and with a lot less money than planned. But I made a commitment to staying positive about my situation and making the most of it.

This is when I met Samantha. And it is to her that the endless heart-felt romanticism on this blog has been dedicated. She is my girl, and I'm extremely happy about that. I almost entirely lost my belief that true love and someone quite simply amazing could be part of my daily experience of life. I was so wrong. And she is the proof. So it's time you learnt a bit about her. You've already learnt quite a bit about our relationship in songs such as First Night On The Town (about our first date) and Penny and Jacob (about our experiences leading up to, and on the night of, our first meeting.)

I tell you in no uncertain terms - this girl is quite incredible. Here is a poem with some of the reasons why.

I've now added a recording of me reading this poem as I wanted to not only capture the feeling, energy and fun behind the poem but also I thought it would be nice for it to be heard with my own voice. I feel this really gives the poem its most heart-felt meaning. So click on the player and read along if you like.


I Have A Girl





I have a girl
But not just any girl
She's the greatest in the world
And not just 'cause of her long blonde curls

It's because she has so much heart
It really sets her apart
I knew right from the start
But that's just one small part

Of what makes her so great
I could not overstate
How incredible she's been right from our first date
And it just seems so innate

To her - it's just how she is
So bubbly, so much "zing", like champagne's fizz
But it's not just this
It's about all that she is

Like the magic that's in her touch
MMMmmmm...I just love it so much
I never dreamed that I'd meet such
An amazing girl, what a catch

There's no question of this
And it would most certainly be amiss 
For me not mention her sweet tender kiss
Oh, that perfect pink pout - it delivers such bliss

And how could I not mention her mind
Such intelligence is not all that easy to find
But then along with that to be someone so unselfish and kind
And generous, but also fun and relaxed all the time

Plus there's more to say about her wonderful brain
She's a dentist and also a surgeon in training
She volunteers and does so much that's not for her own gain
I wonder sometimes if she couldn't turn off the rain

With just a look from those big almond eyes and perfect smile
And she doesn't even notice men's heads turn for miles
Whenever she walks by with all her elegance and style
I know hopeful men keep her number on file

And wow - how that makes me so glad she's with me
I tell you I'm luckier than any other man can be
And I haven't yet mentioned, she speaks Spanish fluently
I tell you, there's nothing this girl can't achieve

And we have an endless list of similar likes
Such as music, and yoga, or going on hikes
And travelling the world, or just riding our bikes
Plus healthy food and conversation - it really is striking

How many similar interests we share
Oh - and did I mention her hair
What dazzling blonde locks, I can't help but just stare
And the face that it frames is beyond compare

The face of an angel could never be so 
Exquisite as hers, and then what's seen below
That magnificent face is a body to which I could never say no
She makes my heart race and she makes my mind blow

As she is quite simply the definition of hotness, it's true
And to think, in that body is a mind so in tune
With mine - I should spend my life strapped to a pew
Giving thanks to whatever God delivered me this beauty

Oh, and also, she often surfs on her long board at Malibu
At this point you're probably wondering how she finds the time and energy to 
And I'd be happy to tell you, if I knew
It may be hard to believe but this girl is real I tell you!

For there are many things in this world of which I'm unsure
But of this one iron-clad fact I couldn't be more
Definite - that my girl is the greatest lover of all
And every day, without fail, I will only love her more

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

New song, new finger-picking challenge...

When I wrote my song Sunrise To Sunset recently I had to spend a lot of time practicing the finger-picking pattern I wanted to play. I had to start slow and repeat it for ages, then I got it a lot better by the next day at which point I could actually record the song. Until I get a significantly more confident with my finger picking this trend is likely to continue. So although I've basically finished another song I'm not yet able to get through all the picking to a decent standard and do all the singing at the same time. I managed to get the take I've posted below done, with much angst and repetition, but it was a huge challenge and still needs a lot of work.

I'll try to get the song recorded in its entirety by the end of the week. I'll need to, or write something else I can play, as my New Year's Resolution was to post at least one song a week on the blog, not just write the song - although in truth the latter would suffice. But I've made this stipulation as it forces me to make sure the songs are up to at least a very basic performance standard, and without performance the song might as well not exist really. That's what creativity is all about. Sharing it with others.

So have a listen to my latest finger-picking creation in the E-A-D-F#-B-E tuning I'm quite fond of since using it to play the Bon Iver track "re: Stacks". Although, I've since discovered from watching a live bootleg video that he looks to be using another tuning, an open tuning, but anyway. I'm also using a capo on the 7th fret, just to give away all my secrets.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Sid and the Snail Jail

I may have mentioned that a number of years ago I did some study in comprehensive writing. This included writing quite a few very short stories around 800 to 1200 words. I must say, writing something worth reading in that few words is a massive challenge. It's very interesting to write a short story to discover it's 3000 words then try to cut everything you can out of it to get it to 2200. Then try again to get it to 2000, but feel like you couldn't possibly cut more, just to end up editing with proverbial industrial power tools and get it down to a 1200 word story or less.

This is one of the ones I wrote and I've decided to post it as it sticks with my current motivational theme. Adults can definitely get something out of the story but it was actually written as a children's story, although fails slightly in that regard I think in terms of language. If it was being read to a child rather than read by a child it might be OK. The reader would have to know what I was shooting for with the cockney-type English accent on the Stink Bug character though.

So have a read and please comment, as I'd love to know what you think. It's not long. Just a little fun read with a simple life lesson that we can all learn from.



                                     Sid and the Snail Jail                                                         


“Get out of the rain, Christopher, or you’ll catch ya death o’ cold.” The commanding voice cut through the droning rain.
“Awww, Mum – but there’s soooo many snails around and the ducks love snails!” the boy pleaded as he grabbed another snail and put it in his terracotta pot.
            “They’ll still be around after the rain stops. They won’t just disappear. Put your pot face down over them. If you hurry you can have some hot cookies.”
            The boy found a sudden need to be obedient and ran inside, leaving his ‘snail jail’ out in the garden. 

* * * * *

            “This is just great, Sid! First chance we’ve had to get out for weeks and now we’re stuck in here, soon to be a duck’s appetiser.” Sam’s antennae sagged.
            “Well, there’s no use just sitting here and getting upset about it. We should try to find some way of escaping.” Sid stretched his neck out of his shell and examined their snail jail. “Look up the top, Sam. Holes. Maybe we can get through them?”
            Sid took off up the snail jail wall at full snail pace. Others had also spotted this small window of opportunity and soon all four holes had a snail head sticking through them.
            Sid groaned and grunted, trying to push his rigid shell through the small hole. “There’s no way I’ll ever get my shell through that hole, Sam. No two ways about it. And I’m the smallest snail in here.”
            He craned his neck around outside the hole, looking through the rain for a possible saviour, but there was no-one. “Can anyone please help us? We’re gonna be duck food! H-e-e-e-lp!” he screamed, but no reply came. “No-one will be able to hear me above this rain.” He whispered to himself as he slid his head back through the hole and retracted back into his shell. “You’re right, Sam, we’re gonna be duck food.”
They were heading slowly back to the floor of the jail when a voice called from behind them, “Did one o’ you snails call fur ’elp?”
Sid turned to see the front end of a young stink bug poking through the hole. “Yeah, I did. But how could you possibly help us?”
“I d’know. You’ll have t’explain yer predicament.”
“Isn’t it obvious? We’re stuck in here! And after the rain stops we’re being fed to ducks!” Sid could feel his desperation growing with each moment. “If we could just fit our shells though those holes…”
The little bug examined the hole. “Well, if at’s the case then you’re right – there’s nofink I can do. Sounds like yer can ‘elp yerself though – jus’ leave yer shell be’ind. If it weren’ for all tha’ baggage yer’d be ‘ome free, mate! Sure, yer’d be more a slug than a snail, but yer’d be a live slug. A change never ‘urt no-one.”
Some other snails were listening in and a wrinkled old snail butted in. “What you’re proposing simply isn’t possible. In all my years I’ve never seen a snail leave its shell behind. And besides, we need our shells to hide in.” The old snail grumbled.
The little stink bug strode right up to the large crotchety snail. “Yer might never’a seen no-one leave their shell be’ind but I bet yer also never seen no-one try n’leave it be’ind, eh?”
“Well…maybe not but only because I’ve never met anyone stupid enough to try. Some things simply just are. No two ways about it.” He stretched his neck out stiffly. “I can hear the rain easing so the boy could be back any moment anyhow. Now go take your so-called ‘elp’ elsewhere.”
“O.K. then gramps. Don’ strain anyfink. I got plenny of beh’a finks ado than listen to the drivel of a secon’ rate entrĂ©e.” The bug turned and headed for the hole but stopped for a moment and looked back over his shoulder. “Yer know, my grandpa once said that wha’ lies before us and wha’ lies be’ind us are tiny matters compared with wha’ lies within us.” He kept walking.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” The old snail said spitefully.
“I’s ‘opin’ yer might be able a tell me, actually?” He chuckled, and then flew off.
“The rain’s stopped, Sid. We’re doomed!” Sam grabbed Sid’s antennae with his and shook him. “Are you listening to me space cadet!”
“What…sorry.” Sid’s snapped out of it. “I was just thinking about what that bug said. I’ve never actually seen a snail try to leave its shell behind, so how do I know we can’t?”
“You heard the old guy; it’s just the way it is, no two ways about it…”
“But Sam, it wouldn’t hurt to at least try, and if we all help each other I think we can do it.” Sid stuck his neck up high in excitement. “I say we give it a go!” He shouted to everyone. “It’s what’s within us that counts, not what’s behind or what’s ahead or what we carry on our backs.” The snails responded with shouts and hollers.
“You know, Sid, you’re right!” shouted Sam. “We can do this!”

* * * * *
             “Mum, Mum, look in my pot!” The boy’s feet beat against the wooden floor as he ran inside, shouting at the top of his lungs. “There’s just empty shells! The snails have all disappeared – well, except a big one with a faded lookin’ shell. He can come meet the ducks.”

Sunday, January 2, 2011

A little action can make a big difference

We're probably all trying to stay committed to our New Year's Resolutions right now. So I'm going to write one of my motivational "articles" now to try and be of help. I write this for myself as much as anyone else.

I will say first though - The Stuns have a song called "New Fear's Resolution" which is about trying to commit to change in your life and how hard that is. Check it out on iTunes. If you like it please download a copy. Just search for "The Stuns" and it's on our debut album, "Life After The Black Box". In fact, the album has a number of songs about struggling to make changes or attain goals - "Beyond My Reach", "Here We Are Again", "Life" - so please have a listen if you haven't already.

I mentioned recently that my favourite quote right now is one from Ralph Waldo Emerson - "An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory."

One of the reasons an ounce of action is worth so much is because often just a small amount of action can result in a lot being achieved, often breaking through a procrastination barrier.

Say your garden really needs weeding. If you have a lot of garden the sheer size of the job usually results in procrastination. But resolving to weed just one little patch of garden wouldn't be nearly so hard, so you'd be much less likely to procrastinate. The result of this will at very least be that you gradually get your garden weeded piece by piece over a few weeks or more. You may say that you find it easier to just put aside a whole day at the end of those few weeks and do the entire job at once, and there's nothing wrong with planning like that, as long as it is planning and doesn't just result in procrastination. At the end of the day you have nothing to lose by doing a little bit now. I try to be very aware of when I'm planning and when I'm actually just making an excuse to procrastinate.

The interesting thing is that once you start that little bit it's common to actually continue on and do more than the little bit you planned to do, so the cycle of procrastination is broken.

This could well be likened to the effect of rolling a small snow ball down a hill. It's size and speed increase as it goes, although it only took a tiny bit of effort to get it started.

So getting started is the key. And the key to getting started is not taking on the entire task at once, which on a more general note equates to setting extremely realistic goals and plans so that you aren't overcome by the size of an entire job, are more inclined to get started now and so that you gain extra motivation from achieving your goals.

I feel like I say this a lot in my blog.

http://myfighttowrite.blogspot.com/2010/11/steven-beaver.html
http://myfighttowrite.blogspot.com/2010/12/breaking-down-wall.html
http://myfighttowrite.blogspot.com/2010/12/endings-are-often-beginnings.html

But then I guess it's because I'm trying to keep myself committed to this mindset as I know how powerful it can be.

I hope 2011 is a year that sees you get things done that you've been putting off. That you make changes you've been struggling with. That you change mindsets and perspectives you've been stuck in.

If 2010 wasn't a year of happiness for you then take a little action today to change the things that are keeping you down and you will without doubt make 2011 a year that is full of happiness. If in doubt test my theory. I expect that in the little action of testing my theory the snow just may start rolling.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Penny & Jacob

It's a New Year and I'm very excited to say that the internet usage here has refreshed and I have my internet back. Sweet relief.

I'm not big on New Year's resolutions to be totally honest as I think resolutions are simply something you should make for yourself every day, always looking to better yourself and push yourself out of your comfort zone. But I will say that I have one resolution for this year and that is to never let a week pass without posting a new song on this blog. I did have a long spell of not having instruments handy up until recently but that shouldn't be an issue from now on, so I believe this resolution is very achievable.

So I'm going to refer to a week as being from Monday to Sunday and this song I'm posting today is for the week past.

I will state one more resolution, and I think we should all make this same one. To live by these wise words from Ralph Waldo Emerson, "An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory." I've already been trying to do this but I want to be even more pro-active with this through the coming year. Sometimes you simply have to stop talking and start doing. It is so easy to make excuses for why we didn't do something today and being aware that you are making excuses is the first step to ending them and just getting on with some action. Any action, no matter how minimal.

So here is my song. I will mention the usual disclaimers regarding recording quality and sub-par performance. As usual this was recorded late at night and I needed to be quiet. I'll do a better recording soon.


Penny & Jacob



Penny sits staring at the sky
Through windows as beads of rain drip down them outside
It feels like these dreary winter rains won’t subside
Laying on the sofa, lonely mornings roll by

As do the tears
That flow down from her eyes
Lost in goodbyes
Recounting the years
Now thrown onto the fire
With her hopes and desires

Jacob sits and listens to a tape
That she made for him when he had to go away
That was when she would say “I love you” every day
And he would stroke long blonde hairs from her face

But now the tears
Are all that’s left in their place
They dry on his face
Recounting the years
He grew in her embrace
He can never replace

Talking to his brother and a friend
Everyone’s laughing and eating oysters there
Then Penny walks in glowing smile and hair
And when Jacob sees her he can’t help but stare

And all his fears
Melt away as she sits on the chair
Next to him there
And in the years
Ahead he’d say that was where
He found love so fair

For as the weeks
Rolled by all that he dared
To hope for was there
And he could hear
His heart whisper a prayer
That she’d always be there

As they drew nearer
Each day this love that they share
Grew beyond compare
And all the tears
They cry are joyful and their
Sad days, hurts, doubts and cares
Exhaled like the air
They breathe as they wear
Each other like hair
They touch everywhere
True love now is theirs